You get a sense that something isn’t quite right, that your needs are not being met and that your partner simply isn’t as responsive to you as they used to be. This can start years before an actual divorce or it can happen in a matter of months. Let’s take a closer look at the generally accepted psychological stages of divorce you’ll deal with at some point. It’s the duration and intensity that changes, but the emotional playbook is pretty much the same. I said, I appreciate that, then would you please explain about the fifty ways.”Įveryone deals with divorce differently, but the stages everyone goes through are surprisingly similar. “I wish there was something I could do to make you smile again. While you won’t escape all your feelings, in the name of healing, you can try to understand what you have already started to go through so that you can look for signs you are making progress in your life. More than likely, you’ll experience some kind of an emotional cocktail with shots of resentment, anger, shock, betrayal, guilt, distance, numbness, decreased self-esteem, insecurity, revenge and perhaps even a small jigger of hoping to reconcile tossed in and served cold, over ice. You’ll be filled with a jumble of contradictory thoughts and feelings whether you were the initiator or not and whether you ultimately feel a sense of relief when it happens. – Paul Simon, 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover There must be fifty ways to leave your lover.” I’d like to help you in your struggle to be free, The answer is easy if you take it logically. “The problem is all inside your head, she said to me, If you’ve put any amount of effort into a marriage (and we’re assuming you have), you will not get out of a marriage unscathed by your emotions.Įxpect a certain amount of chaos in your heart and in your head. Just remember: What you’re going through emotionally is completely normal. Your divorce will likely be one of the most disruptive periods of your life.
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